Forget Bridezilla - Here Comes Momzilla!

This isn't something I normally talk about, but I really need to rant right now.

For the past few months, I've been locked in epic combat with my mom regarding wedding dresses.

My mom wants a western white dress with lace and beading and fussy finery, not to mention a train down the back leading into the netherworld.

My dream wedding dress is a rich red corset, A-line to my toes, with gold or champagne accents. I have always loved the red/gold color combo and I can't imagine myself in a girly-girl dress surrounded by tulle and lace. I abhor the thought of white, white everywhere. I need color, I need practicality, I need to avoid the boring and cliché. Tradition is just not my nature.

A woman's wedding is her day, but I acknowledge it's also a time for family. So I compromised. After a whirlwind of dress shopping, I finally found one that bridged the gap. A beautiful Vera Wang in ivory, with a touch of finery, an elegant chapel train, and potential for removable colored sash, to satisfy my lust for pigment. I shared some photos with my mom, and she was happy with the choice. It matched neither ideal, but held a nice middle ground. I thought the war was over.

Then this morning, I got a panicked call. She had shown the photos to some co-workers. They told her if the bridal gown was not white, it signified the bride was re-marrying, meaning it was not her first wedding. Apparently, ivory did not cut it. Even though it's close to white, her co-workers still thought it meant a 2nd or 3rd marriage, not the first.

Well. This got my mom all in a huff. Based on some shitty perception from the 50's, she re-started the battle. Even though nobody really cares about dress color these days, even though my friends and family know this is my first wedding and only their opinions count, even though Vic and I have been together longer than most married couples, my mom is twisting this archaic mentality into a big deal.

Logic doesn't sway her. Ivory looks better on my skin. In this modern age, colors no longer hold the same symbolism. Her co-workers represent a generation of thinking that I don't share. But I could not convince her that ivory is a good color. She has renewed her insistence on white.

I have tried my best to make mom happy. We have fundamental differences in taste that will never go away, but I have conceded quite a bit. I can't believe she's letting the squawks of some co-workers, even if they are her friends, ruin a compromise we made. It's annoying, it's rude, it's frustrating and presumptuous.

Fuck it. I'm sticking with the ivory dress and her co-workers can stuff their old fashioned thinking up their asses.